Cooling Down

AA wrote: Måndag är inte måndag utan dina visdomsord. Dagens är också mycket bra. Bilden med att vännen dör under grälet är mycket tänkvärd. Tack!

BB wrote: I love that you quote an 18th century poet! This is lovely! And just what I needed….Thank you. 

Cooling Down

The greatest remedy for anger is delay.         
              Lucius Annaeus Seneca

When we get angry, our feelings often go berserk and we react negatively quicker than we can think. In these situations, the greatest service we can do to ourselves, and others, is to stop. Try to remember to stop the very instant you get caught up in irritation or anger, and breathe. Learning to slow down and watch your reactions saves many a relationship...

William Shenstone, 18th century poet, wrote: : “Consider, when you are enraged at anyone, what you would think if he should die during the dispute.” Truly, in the light of a whole friendship, a long-lasting love relation or the education of your children, the momentary anger is… like the wind outside your house. A careless act or badly chosen words are just like the wind: they quickly pass. Your love for a friend, a partner or a child is bigger and more important. Imagine if she or he would actually die right in the middle of a dispute. How awful if the last words you uttered were those of anger!

Try to slow down your reactions. Three deep breaths create the delay, necessary for them to be less overwhelming and more adequate. 

Patience

AA wrote: I appreciate your newsletter!  I sometimes reexamine the things (or people) I wait upon, and then often, simply move on.

BB wrote: I completely understand the feeling you described. Waiting is a frustrating matter in general. Yet I think me and you also have different definitions of patient. From my experience from 30 years of my life in Islamic Republic I can say I'm a more patient person than you. You know why? Because basically in this government you have to wait for everything even the simplest works. So we have more patience than Swiss or Swedish people, because you don't have to wait as much as we do.

CC wrote: Ich bin auch nicht sehr geduldig. aber es wird immer besser mit dem Warten. Ich kann dann häufig einfach meine Umgebung betrachten.

Patience

Patience is not simply the ability to wait - it's how we behave while we're waiting.

                     Joyce Meyer

I am not a very patient person. Having to wait for others makes me jittery, and I'm often close to loosing my temper. Keeping calm while waiting is something I am constantly working on - and improving, bit by bit.

If you are a little like me and get tensed up when there is waiting time - remember how to stop. Stop right where you are and close your eyes. Do your best to smile, even if at first it does not feel natural. Take some deep breaths, all the way down into your belly. 

Remind yourself that your rhythm is only yours and that other people’s are different. Realize that it can only do you good to slow down. This is the occasion to practice mindful breathing, to come back to yourself, and to practice patience.

The essential thing is not just resigning to wait, but to do so with a smile in your face. It's your attitude that counts. 

The Gift of Attention

AA wrote: J J

BB wrote: Thank you! Have a good week-start. J

CC wrote: I wanted to thank you for your beautiful gift of attention. It feels so good to have such a close friend within such a long distance.

The Gift of Attention

The most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention. When mindfulness embraces those we love, they will bloom like flowers.
                                    Thich Nhat Hanh

We don’t always know how to show the people in our lives how much care we about them. A letter, flowers or other little presents are lovely ways, but the most precious gift is our attention.

When we are fully there for the ones we love, without thinking about anything else, wondering or planning, we are giving them the best present they can ever get. To attentively see, listen to and care for another person is like immerging her in a shower of warm, nurturing rain: it will make her open up like a flower and shine.

Constant Questioning

AA wrote: Veckans text passar mig utmärkt. Ett problem är att ganska få är intresserade att diskutera viktiga frågor på djupet, det mesta blir på ytan

BB wrote: Du legst immer immer immer den Finger auf den wundern Punkt! Unglaublich. Du regst zur Selbstbetrachtung ein. 

Falls Du Deine Werke mal als Band zusammenfassen, mit einigen hübschen Vignetten versehen, an Verlage schicken möchtest, ich wäre so gern Deine Illustratorin! 

Constant Questioning

The key to wisdom is this - constant and frequent questioning, for by doubting we are led to    question and by questioning we arrive at the truth.
                                                                                       Pierre Abélard

We all have our points of view and our habits, a certain way to see and do things. It’s convenient to stick to what we’re used to think, say and do: it comes mechanically and we don’t have to give it a second thought.

However, habits lull us into forgetfulness. It’s like closing off parts of life and cling to what feels safe, because we know it. Deep down inside, however, we know that nothing is “safe” and that we and our world are constantly changing…

Wake up! Take a critical look at your views about politics, religion, or education: are you really convinced, or did you just adopt them because of a friend, your parents or the way you thought the world looked back then…? Turn your views around, question them, search complementary information - and maybe you will end up wiser and more true to who you are today.